My Whole Thought.

The fear may be letting it stay as it is, and when they try to do it,

I won't be able to to it myself.

It's just the struggle between the familiar and the right,

and even now I don't know what it going to happen,

and I hate it.

They fought for attention,

whilst THEY fought for food,

and sonetimes I just want to kill those killers.

Found out that no matter how long I'm going to stare and try,

I will never be able to verbalize what I really think or feel,

It's just that words can neven do the right job.

She expects me to do it all on my own.

Almost all wills have been changed,

and I feel like there's no way out, at least.

AGH.

It's only another three levels to the top.

He agreed.

Can't describe the grace and the fear, don't know if I do,

but he just let it happened.

I don't know how I dared to even look for him,

beneath all the men in uniforms.. I was actually expecting to see him.

Will he stay alive?

Made another decision when I saw them, the will and the demanded are shouting too loud-

Can't shut them down.

Can't verbalize the feel when you can't sleep just because of your stupid fear.

Words can't say what I really feel inside,

this hole.

But I want this life to happen so much.

It always makes it grow.. and the feel,

that there's no way you could have changed that -

is enough to make you down.

Such a foolish.

All the stupid grades would have never be compared to the real knowledge,

and I feel as if someone tried to sink me.

I have to change things. and it must be done fast.

And explain... just have to explain all the time,

even to myself.

-I want this life so badly, but when it comes to,

just can't bear it.

~

Haven't arrange a thing.

It's as if I let death take me over.

I have to set it all, I have to run from office to office,

I have to buy a ticket.

They won't let me go,

So I musn't cry either.

I'll have to tell them goodbye, to remain some letters.

Too much to deal right now. I wish I hadn't been so much

like me.

And it feels like dancing on fire,

when all you want to do is hold it,

and all you want to do is come closer to the heat,

it's just that you've never been the brave one.